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June 7, 2013 / justinbatalden

A short story (Part One)

I am staring at my ceiling in my bedroom following the hideous white textured paint job that every house seems to have in my apartment complex. To me it is the only thing that can get my mind off the events of the day. With each rough bit of spackle I run my eyes over, they take with them a memory. I take deep breaths trying to slow my heart rate. My heart has been a nusiance all day giving me warnings left and right for a bounding squirrel or a spastic burst of feathers from a startled bird. It also caused me to go to new worlds, that part of my day is what I really want to forget.
So I started to leave all the events behind with my hideous white spackled ceiling. It was working until I ran out of space in the ceiling. I tried to overlap memories but that would just bring that memory out and implant back into my mind.
It started when i woke up this morning, my alarm didn’t wake me up it was my heart that did. My whole body pulsating with every “BA-Dump” that sounded off in my ears, my breath was heavy, my mouth was dry from snoring and lack of water, and my eyes were crusted with dried tears. I didn’t remember crying last night but my dream must of been something sad or incredibly happy, but I believe it was the former option to be true. I haven’t dreamed about something happy since my last relationship, which was 2 years ago.
I stood up from my bed my vision going black, my body still pulsating from each “Ba-dump”. I stumble forward trying to find the nearest wall to let my vision come back to normal. I tripped over a pile of clothes falling over planting my face square onto the wall.

June 7, 2013 / justinbatalden

the hardest part is knowing you moved on
and not me
I thought I did
But I didn’t.
I keep dreaming about you.
Keep pining for you to be
Somewhere with me.
But you never are there.
And my throat gets choked
Because I see that you are happy
And I still cant get over you.
I sit in my body wishing I could forget
About what was good
And remember what was bad.
But all I can seem to remember is the good
I want the bad to be prominent.

May 11, 2013 / justinbatalden

Let Go

so to stand by myself

is one of the hardest things

I can’t stand alone

Without thinking about the past

I keep trying to forget

but I just can’t spend enough time

Away from myself.

All I want is to change the past

But that isn’t what will happen

I just wish I could forget

Forget everything that was us

And make this pain disappear

I just can’t find the things to make me forget

I am trying everything

But I spend too much time with myself

I just wish I could let you go.

May 11, 2013 / justinbatalden

I thought I was Strong

I thought I was strong

I thought I could answer

But, honestly I am not

I am a wreck

Every time I think about us

About our future

that once was

I  sob

I break down

I am not happy

Even if I laugh and smile

I am distraught

I am a hopeless human being

That doesn’t have a clue

Of who he could be with

I wish it could of been you

But you decided it

Wasn’t going to be

So I cry

I sob

I break down

June 9, 2012 / justinbatalden

The Folly

With a twist of the hips

And a lunge of the fist

the innocent fall

without a warning call

The men stand tall

Seeping their power

underneath their shower

open mouthed, gaping

Not realizing the raping

of their existence

their disappearance

starting from their feet

to the gaze with it’s heat

They all stare with love

and drink with a push and shove

The tall men stand and watch

Laugh and applaud

while the blood

flows down.

May 2, 2012 / justinbatalden

cant think of anything to post so might as well put an old one up ha

Poetry and Stuff

Chapter 1

I’m writing this as a warning to future unlucky souls that arrive here. To those who find this I’m sorry, to those who don’t find this I’m even more sorry. My name is Jake Tillman, I am a solider of God’s army and I died. The whole dying thing isn’t really what Hollywood likes to portray it. . Death is boring, unsatisfying, and disappointing. It is just instant darkness, no white light, no sweet harmonious sound from distant beings, nor an out of body experience. It is just like someone turning off the light in a windowless room. The only thing those religious cults got right, was there is an afterlife. There is only one afterlife and I will tell you something reader, it isn’t worth it try to live forever if you can. I preferred if I just died, then at least I would be at peace…

View original post 2,709 more words

November 17, 2011 / justinbatalden

So School Sucks

So i realize now that I’m back in school, I haven’t had good idea for writing. It is really frustrating actually. I’m hoping when Thanksgiving break comes up I might come up with some brilliant ideas and post them. I feel kind of bad too because I keep getting emails to post in some of other peoples blogs and what you would call a contest. But I just haven’t come up with anything new and I really don’t want to put my crappy stuff in the contests. Well I just felt the need to post something so here you go. Oh and if you are looking for some new music check out my buddy’s (Kendall Sant) blog, he post tons of new bands that you probably haven’t heard of and he does a good job of describing what they are all about.

September 11, 2011 / justinbatalden

This Beautiful Matrimony

This poem starts with a wedding

A wedding for a friend and another

A gift of happiness and love for spectators

Two out of four sit in a hotel with the fifth

Not really being talkative

Just enjoying the company

The company of long friends

To many they are surprised

That we don’t follow the hollywood norm.

No littered beer cans

No remnants of a hired girl

Nothing to show but two messy beds

And three guys laying on the beds

Two with a computer

One with a notebook

The poems ends with the two out of four

Following the fifth to his new life.

September 11, 2011 / justinbatalden

Ink paints the surface and it is beautiful

The flow, The scratches, The finality,

The pen creates a work of language

language is beautiful

without language we are nothing

without language we don’t have emotions

we don’t have science, knowledge, morals

We are nothing but instinct driven

We are humans

But we are animals

We fuck, we kill, we eat, we survive

we are animals of logue

If we didn’t have logic

We wouldn’t be advanced

So why do people base logic

off a mythical being of creation

Are we scared

Scared of the truth, the utter truth

of nothing after death, of being alone

Well we are nothing but god-loving cowards

And I want to be brave.

September 11, 2011 / justinbatalden

Sudden Deaths, Sudden Births

Sudden revolving cycles

Circle of life is easier to say

Or so I heard from Walter

But I honestly don’t care

Kind of a load of Bullshit

But the more I think

The more I realize Walter was right.

Life doesn’t stop

Life won’t stop for me

For anyone

[I’m just the Mother Fucker

Who tried to stand still

On this damn hamster wheel

The one who was ran over

and has to catch up

But god damn us all

if I should do it again]

Relationships change people

Make both people different

But then again I’m still me

She is still her

We are trying to meld

Both our own ways

which clash and I fall back

not fixing anything